


Emma Swan Gets a Little Stranger

by lostlilsnail



Series: Strange Happenings [2]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Crack, F/F, Fluff, Humor, Let us pray for Emma, she's doing her best
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-07
Updated: 2019-09-07
Packaged: 2020-10-05 02:59:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20481731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostlilsnail/pseuds/lostlilsnail
Summary: The very embarrassing story of how it all happened.A lightly edited repost from FF.net. Prequel to Storybrooke Gets a Little Stranger.





	Emma Swan Gets a Little Stranger

Regina Mills is very busy and she really, _ really _doesn't have time for this.

"Yes. Fine, whatever you want. Text me the details later."

Her eyes flicker over her desk as she ensures she hasn't forgotten anything. Her meeting is in just under fifteen minutes, she's got another at four, Leroy's been hounding her about those housing proposals, _ and _now she has to review the--late, because of course, it's Emma--reports from the sheriff's station.

"R-really?"

With a heavy sigh, Regina spares her guest a glance. Emma's standing in front of her desk, brow furrowed and cheeks a dusty pink, blinking slowly.

"Were you hoping for a rejection?"

Emma shakes her head a sputters out a quick, "No. Not at all. Yes is good. Yes is great. I just thought-" she trails off, shrugs, "I dunno. I guess I thought that it would be more, uh," winces, "involved? Most stuff with us usually is." Her chuckle is breathy and forced.

What? Honestly, when Regina had decided to make an effort in fostering a friendship with her arch nemesis she hadn't imagined she'd need a pocket translator to navigate every conversation. Granted, Regina might not have much experience with friendships, but surely they shouldn't be this much of a...process?

Her phone pings its reminder that she should already be in the conference room. Regina gathers up her folders as neatly as she can manage in her haste.

"I'm sure we'll manage a simple dinner. We have been just about every week for a few months now."

Emma's features are twisted up again. "Yeah," she allows, though openly dubious, "but I'd say this is just a _ bit _different, no?"

"Is it?" Regina challenges, fighting to keep what little patience she possesses. Her phone pings again - she's a little anal about timeliness.

"Huh," Emma's gaze is far off and wistful and Regina fights the urge to send her out of the office by way of magic.

Reformed, Regina. _You are reformed._

"Wow, I guess I just didn't know you've been in that headspace?" Emma's shoulders sag a bit in what might be relief, but Regina doesn't quite have the time to analyze at the moment.

She heads towards the door, urging Emma to follow. "I'm sorry, Emma, but I really have to move along. Like I said, text me the details. I'm sure we'll work something out." With a wave to both Emma and Terry--the only person in Storybrooke brave enough to play secretary to the Evil Queen--Regina takes off down the hall.

"Right, yeah, of course," Emma calls after her, lingering by Terry's desk. "I'll just, uh, do that then. Okay. Right."

And just as she turns the corner Regina thinks she might see Terry flash Emma a hammy thumbs up, but she doesn't have time to wonder about whatever is going on there because, well, Regina Mills is very busy and she really, _ really _doesn't have time for this.

-

Emma Swan is being very strange. Well, either that or Regina is so socially inept after years of abuse, isolation, and villainy that she doesn't know how friendship works.

With her previous experience--or, well, pitiful lack thereof--Regina's inclined to believe the latter. Afterall, she'd had roughly four genuine friends up to this point in life. Daniel had been a chaste, fantastical whirlwind that had ended in tragedy. Tinkerbell had spent a grand total of, what, three hours in her company? Maleficent had taught her dark arts. And she'd ordered Kathryn kidnapped…

Not a great track record.

So, well, Regina supposes Emma's the expert between them. She'll have to follow where the other woman leads, even if Regina hadn't been aware that friends were so _ touchy feely _with each other.

See, they go to dinner, and it's fine. Just like every other time they dine together. Henry's noticeably absent but it's his weekend with Emma so when she asks and learns he's staying the night at Nick's she doesn't push the topic. Everything is fine. Normal.

It's nice and easy and comfortable, just as it is when Henry's between them.

No, the strangeness comes later. Days later when Emma shows up at the house looking a little sheepish and uncomfortable as she hesitates in the doorway and says, "I know it's not exactly protocol, but I figure our situation is pretty different than average so, you wanna hang out?"

And Regina's not quite sure what that means but she has plenty of free time today and doesn't mind the company so she steps back and invites her inside. Because, well, friends.

After years and years and years, she's pretty committed to trying it out for real (honestly the more she thinks about it Kathryn _ really _doesn't count).

They sit together in the living room after a light lunch and watch some mindless action adventure film Regina doesn't remember the name of because a third of the way through has Emma scooting closer to her. Strange. And then at the halfway mark they're pressed together. Stranger. And by the final act she finds herself tucked against Emma, an arm around her shoulders.

Which is just- well, not _ bad _ or _ uncomfortable _ per se_, _ but certainly not normal, surely. Is this just the sort of friends they are now? Regina supposes she _ has _seen Snow and Ruby rather chummy about town. Hanging off one another. Cuddling, laughing. Just because Emma's never initiated anything like this before doesn't mean anything.

But Emma must notice how stiff she is because she rubs soothing fingers over her arm and murmurs, "Is this okay?" as though Regina's slightest whim would be her command. Like Regina can stop or start anything on a word alone.

Regina hesitates for just a moment and then swallows, nods, and Emma's arm grows heavier across her shoulders.

She thinks she might like it.

Still though, _ strange. _

-

About a week later Regina learns she and Emma are now the sort of friends who hold hands in public.

Even Emma seems a little uncertain about it at first. They're headed down the sidewalk towards Granny's, Henry a few paces ahead of them, when the tips of her fingers brush against Regina's palm. It's a few seconds more until she fully commits, and even then she keeps her grip loose so Regina can slip free at any time.

Regina doesn't.

-

Emma is over the mansion more often than not.

Sometimes she's in the living room playing video games with Henry or watching some asinine film about space cowboys or gallant knights, which is safe, normal, neutral territory.

Other times she's not.

Other times she's slumped across the island countertop after a long day at the station, watching with a serene, content expression as Regina bustles about making dinner. Or she's on the couch, stretched out, staring up at Regina from where her head rests in the other woman's lap while Regina reads.

Emma spends a lot of time just looking at her these days. Just watching.

And Regina, who's not really sure what Emma's looking for, does her best to carry about her day as though she doesn't notice.

It's exhausting.

-

Emma, Regina decides, is a very good friend. She thinks, especially after all the bad she's done, she's very lucky to get such a good one on the very first go (she's thought about her past in more detail and decided nobody counts except maybe her horse and, well, she ripped out Rocinante's heart for witchcraft so-).

Emma opens doors for her and pulls out her chair at the dinner table. Emma helps Regina carry in her groceries when she notices her struggling out in the driveway. Emma helps clean up around the house when she's been visiting often, which, well, is pretty much always. Emma allows Regina to pick the film every other viewing, even though she seems to fall asleep during documentaries more often than not. Emma kneads the knots out of Regina's back when she notices her wincing after a long day spent hunched over paperwork in the office. Emma takes Regina out to the few decent restaurants dotted about Storybrooke and buys her a meal. Emma invites her for little trips to the park during their lunch break and rests a hand on her lower back while they walk the short trail and talk about their days.

It's a little intimidating, if she's honest. Emma has seemed to pick up this friend thing rather well and is going all out and Regina feels as though she's a step or two behind.

It's hard to keep up.

-

Time passes, and Regina leans into Emma without prompting now. She's warm and comfortable and safe, and Regina doesn't know what she was so stiff about all those weeks before. This has quickly become her favorite part of their friendship. The constant contact. The reassurance of it. Her favorite thing in the world has become tucking herself under Emma's arm as they watch a superhero film with Henry.

And then he eventually yawns and wanders up to bed and she and Emma sit and talk until it gets so late Emma has to leave or risk falling asleep behind the wheel on her way home. Lately she's been lingering later and later, and when they're saying goodnight sometimes she hovers in the doorway as though she's waiting for..._something_, until eventually she just sighs and smiles and leaves.

And that's their routine now. Their normal.

Until suddenly it's not.

Until one day Emma's hovering in the doorway and when Regina says, "Goodnight," she smiles and leans forwards and places a gentle kiss against Regina's cheek. It's soft and delicate and Regina flushes a bit as she stands and watches Emma head out to the driveway, dumbstruck.

_ What._

She's seen other friends partake of course. Again, Ruby and Snow seem to be constantly entangled. They certainly come to mind. But Emma is so- Well, she's not like them. Has never been.

And not to mention the fact that Emma's friendly kiss goodbye had stirred up some very _not_ friendly feelings in Regina. Things like warmth and fluttering and other embarrassing sweetness. She watches as the Bug pulls out onto the street and takes off down the road into the night with a hand to her cheek.

Regina might be in a little bit of trouble.

-

Emma is a very good friend and Regina has a very big problem.

She's so bad at this. So bad at domestic life and normal everyday not-murdering-people that she can't even have a friend the right way. Can't even function well enough to keep a single 'bestie', as Henry would say, without falling in love with her.

It's Emma's fault, really. Everything usually is. This is no different. What with the touching and the smiling and the kindness and the hand holding. Like, fuck off. Come on. Regina's _ not _supposed to start harboring an all consuming love that threatens to destroy their relationship?

She's been set up for failure and she's more than a little upset.

Why do these things always happen to _ her? _ She'd been trying to be good this time too. This is so unfair.

Regina sits at the island counter in her kitchen, arms crossed as she pouts and laments her lot in life until Emma walks in. She does that now. Just enters the house without so much as a knock. And Regina doesn't even mind because Emma has gone and corrupted her. Probably for nefarious savior purposes.

"Hey, I noticed you were low this morning," Emma holds up a shopping bag, "so I grabbed a carton of milk."

What a manipulative bitch.

"And of course, you know, snacks for movie night." Emma chuckles as she places the bags on the counter and roots around inside. "I've finally gathered up the courage to inform you that celery sticks aren't gonna fly anymore. Henry and I have taken a poll and decided they suck, no matter how much peanut butter you slather on them to trick us." She flashes a kind smile. "I did try to get some sort-of-healthy-ish junk food though so don't be too mad."

Stupid Emma and her stupid endearing thoughtfulness and her stupid concern of Regina's approval.

Asshole.

-

That night Regina isn't even sure what movie her little makeshift family watches. All she can focus on as she lays on the couch--arms tucked under her head, feet in Emma's lap where they're absently rubbed, little tingly pulses shooting through her--is how to say just what's going through her mind. Because this isn't okay.

Regina is poison and bitterness and shadow and rigidity while Emma is laughter and compassion and afternoon sun. She's lucky enough to call her friend. Looking for anything more is asking for rejection. And she's sure her heart can't handle another. Regina's too old. Too tired. It's time to be realistic.

And so she ignores the movie and does her best to find a way to ease her suffering.

But how does one say to a friend, "Please stop touching me in your usually friendly ways, it's making me want to have sex with you," while still maintaining that friendship and what little remains of their dignity?

...

Quite a pickle.

-

Emma forces her to dinner at the loft with Snow and David.

She laughs at the disgruntled look on Regina's face. "Come on, it's my mom. You had to know a family dinner was in the cards sooner or later."

No, she hadn't. But well, Emma's got that soft affection in her eyes she sometimes gets when talking to Regina and it's enough to make her melt. Or, apparently, agree to anything.

"I suppose I can suffer through a single meal," she sighs out, and it earns her a wide grin and another kiss on the cheek.

Regina stands a bit straighter, even as she also wants to die from the guilt. Well, it's something to obsess over the entire ride to the loft at least.

She's very, very tired.

-

It's awkward. Snow and David are all over her. It's like they're overcompensating for something, but Regina doesn't know _ what_. All she knows is that she's very uncomfortable when they both gather her up into great crushing hugs and that when Snow pulls away she's a little teary eyed.

Always stay home, Regina. Always get in your pajamas and lock the door and stay home.

The chatter throughout dinner is casual and polite. Here used as synonyms for boring and forced. And afterwards, looking for a little space, Regina offers to clear the table. Snow insists on helping though, and so they wind up together side by side in the kitchen while Emma, David, and Henry carry a rambunctious, giggly conversation in front of the television.

Snow corners her almost immediately, of course.

"I'm happy, you know." Snow flashes a timid smile. "I know it wouldn't stop you either way, but, If it means anything- even just for Emma's sake, I wanted you to know."

Regina furrows her brow and scrubs hard at the plate in her grip and says, "Okay?" Snow is happy? What is this? Just a weird dig that the curse didn't work?

Did the woman not know it had been broken over a year ago?

"I just-"

Oh, god, is she crying? Why is she crying? Regina's eyes widen and she scrubs harder.

"I never dreamed it could ever end up like this." Snow's cheeks are damp, her voice thick and watery and Regina wants to die a little bit. "And I hated it at first but now- now I think maybe it was meant to be."

"Snow," Regina gasps, exasperated. The last thing she needs right now is for Emma and Henry to turn around and think she'd made the precious princess cry. "It's just dinner."

A bark of a laugh erupts from Snow. "Right. You're right." She smiles and swipes under her eyes. "One step at a time."

And Regina really doesn't know what's going on. All she knows is that she doesn't want to be here and Snow looks like she might be about to hug her again so she thrusts her arms into the soapy water in the sink and roots around for more silverware as she says, "Your meatloaf is terrible."

Snow just laughs again.

-

If Regina wasn't going to hell before--which she definitely was--she is now.

Poor, sweet Emma. Kind and generous and thoughtful. Giving it her all. Striving to be the best friend she can be. And Regina just sits and stares and thinks about how much she'd like to see her naked.

Which is totally inappropriate and way out of line and also driving her really, really mad because Emma just _ won't stop touching. _

She's bound to burst. It's not even her fault. Frankly she's impressed she lasts as long as she does. It's a miracle really. Especially when suddenly Emma's acting like they're the sort of friends who have adult sleepovers on work nights. Which should be weird, Regina thinks. Except it means Emma's in her bed in tiny pajamas sleeping next to her through the entirety of the night so it's not.

It's just amazing. And also very stressful. And also very frustrating. And also probably not great for her blood pressure.

Emma's in a loose shirt and these tiny shorts that may as well not even be there and she settles into the mattress with a heavy sigh. "I'm so mad at you for this. It's so soft, I can't believe you've been holding out on me."

Regina just swallows and smiles and tries to ignore the running mantra in her head, _ tinyclothesemmainbedtinyclothesemmainbedtinyclothesemmainbed. _

Maybe she should start seeing Archie again.

Emma bids her goodnight before turning out the light and Regina just barely manages to force the word from her tight throat before she feels an arm slide over her stomach and she's pulled firmly against Emma's chest.

This is how she dies.

...

No.

_No_. Regina Mills has been through too much. She can survive one sleepover with her friend.

The one who she's secretly in love with. That she can't have. That is currently wrapped around her like a sloth around a tree.

Wait. No.

Those were the dangly ones. Which ones were more vertical?

Koalas. That's right.

They hadn't had Koalas in the Enchanted Forest. Just wyvern and ogres and dragons and other things that want to shred your skin from your bones and- _ oh god _ Emma's really going all-in on this friendly snuggle. She's got Regina wrapped up tight and her leg between-

"We should have sex," Regina blurts out.

Wait, that had been supposed to be in her head.

Emma stirs beside her, clearly caught half asleep. "W-what?"

Oh thank god. "Nothing. Go to sleep."

"Did you just say-?"

"No."

Emma laughs, breath warm against her neck so Regina shudders a bit and- gods, please stop.

"I gotta say, that's the most direct and incredibly awkward way I've ever been propositioned." She hums a bit and presses a kiss to Regina's shoulder. "Though I guess that's very you."

Regina squeezes her eyes shut and swallows. "You're not mad?"

Emma stills. "Mad?"

"Uncomfortable," Regina amends, holding her breath as she awaits the answer.

"Uh," Emma shuffles about behind her, and Regina feels her push herself up on her elbow, "hey." Gently, Emma pulls at Regina's shoulder to encourage her onto her back. She reaches towards the nightstand then and in a blinding flash the light is back on. Emma studies Regina's flush as she asks, "Why would I be uncomfortable?"

"I tried really hard," Regina defends herself. "I wanted to be as good a friend to you as you are to me, but well- I've never done this before and maybe I got confused, I don't know, But lately I feel like- I feel more."

"More?"

Ugh. Regina rolls her eyes. "About _ you _." What an idiot, really. Honestly it would be just her luck. Close to thirty years of a dark curse to find her happiness and she's saddled with this buffoon.

"Oh." Emma brightens considerably. In fact, she looks rather pleased, which while a bit perplexing, is much better than the disgust Regina had been bracing for. "You're such a dork." Emma laughs at her, all fondness, and then leans down to press a soft kiss to Regina's lips.

It's, well- Regina's whole being is just sort of humming. She basks in the heat, heart pounding as she can scarcely believe this is where the night has taken them. That Emma has remained, that she hasn't run from the house screaming.

And then everything stops because Emma breaks the kiss and presses their foreheads together and breathes, "I love you too," like it's the simplest thing in the world.

"What?" Regina squeaks.

Emma snorts. "I thought direct was your thing?"

"I-" Regina stares up at her, "it's just soon, to say it." She wrinkles her nose in thought. "Right?"

Emma gives a one armed shrug and settles down more comfortably on the mattress. "Well, I'm not gonna pretend I have a lot of experience on the subject but we've been dating for about five months so-"

"We _what_?" Regina jerks out of Emma's light hold and springs up on the mattress. "No we haven't."

"Uh, yes we have?" Emma sits up, brow furrowed at the wild look in Regina's eye. "Sorry," she scratches at her nose, "is this some kind of really weird roleplay thing?"

"We're friends," Regina splutters and Emma raises her eyebrows and laughs.

"Do you do this with your other friends?" She gestures to the space between them on the bed. "I don't."

Oh.

"We're dating," Regina whispers, awed and disbelieving and, honestly, thinking about how a lot of stuff makes a whole heck of a lot more sense.

"Wait," Emma scrambles up on the mattress too, resting on her knees, gaze wide and searching, "are you being serious right now?"

Regina trains her eyes on anything that isn't her companion. "Yes."

"Oh my god." Emma rears back, hands in her hair. "Oh my god, yes." She nods, a little frantic."_Yes_ we're dating. Exclusively, I thought." She winces, looking mortified. "And the rest of the town does too, by the way. So hopefully you're cool with that."

The whole town?

"Why didn't anyone tell me?" Regina snaps, arms crossed.

"It wasn't a secret. We thought you knew."

"You didn't say anything."

"Uh," Emma drawls, "I said, hey, Regina, do you want to go out to dinner with me? And then you said yes? And then we had a nice time? And then we proceeded to date for five months? Any of this ringing bells?"

"Dinner doesn't mean date."

"It does when there's two of us together in a dimly lit area with _ really _overpriced wine." Emma falters, gaze growing distant. "Honestly, those people are running an extortion-"

"Focus." Regina snaps a finger in front of her face. "We've never even _ kissed_."

"Woah, hey," Emma throws her hands up in defense, "we're all, like, emotionally damaged and shit. And, you know, with your history I was trying to be a good person and let you take the lead when you were comfortable."

Regina sniffs. "I'm not emotionally damaged."

"I said we. And, come on, last time I called you cute you threatened arson."

"I don't appreciate mockery."

"I wasn't- ugh, my point is," Emma says, "you get a little, er, _ tense _, about affection. I was trying to be respectful of your boundaries."

Oh.

She's--well, honestly she's mostly humiliated, but--angry. Regina's really angry because Emma's such an _ idiot _she can't even ask a woman out with enough conviction that the person knows what they're agreeing to.

And maybe she's also really angry because she's five months into a relationship where the most she's gotten has been a _ kiss on the cheek _when she's been sexually frustrated for about two-and-a-half. 

"Take off your shirt."

"What?"

Regina pushes Emma onto her back and swings a leg over her waist. Emma blinks up at her all the while.

"You heard me. I'm in charge, that's what you said. So?"

"Okay, see, now I'm getting mixed signals," Emma squeaks out. But she hastens to obey and quickly wriggles out of her shirt. "I feel like we're going from zero to sixty pretty fast here."

"Oh, just wait."

"Oh boy."

-

"Oh my god, I _ knew _it." Henry's flopping about the couch, laughing so hard he's holding his stomach like a literal cartoon.

Regina huffs. It's not _ that _funny. An honest mistake. Anyone could make it really.

"Oh my god," Emma whispers beside her. "You _ did _know. I forgot, a few months ago-"

"Yup." Henry wipes at the tears in his eyes, wearing a grin so smug it would have made the Evil Queen proud in her prime.

"What happened when?" Regina hates being the last in on anything, especially jokes at her expense.

"Like, a few weeks in we were all hanging out and you were, i dunno, making dinner or something-" Emma starts.

"Chicken Marsala," Henry chimes in. He's always got a memory for the details.

"Right, because that's important," Emma teases. "Anyways, the kid leans over during-"

"Iron Man."

"_Hen- _ anyways, kid leans over and is like, 'does Mom know you're dating?' and I was like, 'obviously, what kind of question is that?' and-"

"And now we know Henry is a genius and you guys are complete losers."

"Henry," Regina admonishes while Emma lets out a disgruntled squawk.

"Don't lump me in with her. _ I _ knew I was in a relationship."

Henry busts out laughing again. "N-no," he struggles to gasp through his hysterics, "t-that's the best part. You w-w-weren't."

"Take a breath, Henry," Regina soothes, slightly alarmed even through her embarrassment.

He manages to calm a little, but he's still got this shit-eating grin Regina's inclined to blame Neal for.

"Mom was too lame to know a date request when she heard one and, Ma, you went and made up a fake relationship for yourself anyways. That's _ awesome _."

"Okay, yup," Emma stands, "family meeting time is over. Great. Let's never do this again."

"That's so, so-" He's off all over again, completely lost to his amusement.

"I think this kid is defective, Regina." Emma tosses a throw pillow at Henry where he's rolling about. It hits him square in the face but he just keeps right on howling. "I say we ditch him. Start fresh with a new model."

"Unfortunately," Regina drawls, "I think I'm rather attached to this one."

Emma huffs her disappointment, but there's a smirk tugging at her lips. "You're the boss."

At last, Henry's winding down, and he sighs out a weary, though contented, "I can't wait to tell Gram and Gramps."

Regina's on her feet in seconds.

"_Not on your life." _

-

Months later, after being able to think of little else, Regina prods Emma awake in the dead of night.

"S'wrong?" Emma mumbles, eyes bleary as she emerges from the depths of the comforter. "You 'kay?"

Regina breathes deep. "So, some time ago while discussing Henry, you said- well, I just mean-" She puffs out a frustrated breath. "Just how serious were you about a 'new model'?"

Emma stares then blinks.

Then blinks then stares.

Then blinks again.

And then she slowly drags the comforter back over her head and cocoons herself inside.

"You _ did _ say I was the boss, Swan."


End file.
